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47. 碧浪洗衣粉（Ariel）2016年在印度发布的一则广告中——该广告因谢丽尔·桑德伯格而得到疯狂点赞和转发——一位父亲为自己没给女儿树立分担家务的好爸爸榜样而向女儿道歉。因为他看到作为年轻职业妇女的女儿，在婚姻关系中重现了类似的家庭不平等——女婿完全不分担家务。然而，即便是在这则较为进步地审视了家务分工不平等问题的广告中，那名男士也只是向女儿道歉，而不是妻子。此外，在“老式”的“东方”家庭背景下审视这一问题，貌似“稳妥”一些。尚未出现以美国或英国白人中产阶级家庭为背景的类似广告。Sophie Haslett, “Share the Load, Men!” Daily Mail , March 2, 2016, http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3472171/Ariel-India-advert-encourgaing-men-Share-Load-goes-viral.html.
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48. Office for National Statistics, “Women Shoulder the Responsibility of ‘Unpaid Work,’” November 10, 2016, https://www.ons.gov.uk/employmentandlabourmarket/peopleinwork/earningsandworkinghours/articles/womenshouldertheresponsibilityofunpaidwork/2016-11-10.
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49. US Bureau of Labor Statistics, “American Time Use Survey: Household Activities,” 2016, https://www.bls.gov/tus/charts/household.htm.
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50. 很显然，这类话语都建立在主流的异性恋规范框架上。
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51. Anne-Marie Slaughter, Unfinished Business: Women, Men, Work, Family (London: Oneworld, 2015), 161, 169.
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52. Slaughter, Unfinished Business , 155.
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53. Catherine Hakim, Work-Lifestyle Choices in the 21st Century: Preference Theory (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2000).
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54. Rottenberg, “The Rise of Neoliberal Feminism,” 152–153; 强调为原文所加。
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55.The Modern Families Index 2018 , Working Families, 5, https://www.workingfamilies.org.uk/publications/mfindex2018/.
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56. 例如斯劳特指出，即使公司支持弹性工作制，员工往往也不会去申请，因为在职场文化和规范的约束下，“申请弹性办公以调和工作与生活，无异于宣称自己没有同事那么在乎工作。”——好几位受访者都证实了这一点，尤其是那些在企业的法务和财务部门工作的。Slaughter, Unfinished Business , 62.
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57. 2018年一项英国在职父母的调查发现，家长们认为、同时也发现母亲离职或请假去处理育儿问题比父亲更合适，而且他们相信，自己的雇主也是这样期望的。Modern Families Index 2018 , 19.
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58. Angela McRobbie, The Aftermath of Feminism: Gender, Culture and Social Change (London: Sage, 2009), 80-81.
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59. 英国和美国的公共政策都深化了妇女为儿童照护主力的观念。Sandberg, Lean In , 107.
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60. 例如，Heather L. Hundley and Sara Hayden, Mediated Moms: Contemporary Challenges to the Motherhood Myth (New York: Peter Lang, 2016). 米歇尔·福柯正常化的概念就尤为有力地解释了通过规定何为正常、何为异常来进行管制的力量。正如罗莎琳德·吉尔在《性别与传媒》（Gender and the Media ）中指出的：“这一步步的正常化，影响到我们私人生活的方方面面。”Gill, Gender and the Media , 64.
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61. Sarah Macharia, Who Makes the News? Global Media Monitoring Project 2015 , World Association for Christian Communication, http://cdn.agilitycms.com/who-makes-the-news/Imported/reports_2015/global/gmmp_global_report_en.pdf, p. 8.
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62. Macharia, Who Makes the News? 9.
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63. Cristal Williams Chancellor, Diahann Hill, Katti Gray, Cindy Royal, and Barbara Findlen, The Status of Women in the US Media 2017 , Women’s Media Center, http://wmc.3cdn.net/10c550d19ef9f3688f_mlbres2jd.pdf.
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64. Cécile Guillaume and Sophie Pochic, “What Would You Sacrifice? Access to Top Man-agement and the Work–Life Balance,” Gender, Work & Organization 16, no. 1 (2009): 14-36.
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65. Lauren G. Berlant, Cruel Optimism (Durham, NC/London: Duke University Press, 2011).
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66. Berlant, Cruel Optimism , 166.
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第3章 甜心妈咪 vs. 家庭CEO
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1. 罗伯托只称“我妻子”而不呼其名，呼应了戈夫曼的观点：“只用某人的妻子来称呼一个女人，是把她放在了一个类别里。虽然那个类别眼下只指她一个人，但总归是个群体，而她只是其中一员……类别的核心在于，我们对于她作为‘妻子’群体一员的行为和本性，有一系列社会标准的期望。”Ervin Goffman, Stigma: Notes on the Management of Spoiled Identity (London: Penguin, 1990 [1963]), 70.
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2. Wednesday Martin, “Poor Little Rich Women,” New York Times , May 16, 2015, http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/17/opinion/sunday/poor-little-rich-women.html.
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3. Susan Faludi, Backlash: The Undeclared War against Women (London: Chatto & Windus, 1992), 70–71. 关于维多利亚时代对妇女当全职太太和妈妈的美化，参见Eli Zaretsky, Capitalism, the Family and Personal Life (London: Pluto, 1976)。
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4. Faludi, Backlash , 106; 讨论施瓦茨文章发表后的媒体热潮，以及《三十而立》（Thirtysomething ）等热门电视剧对全职妈妈的描绘，另见Susan Douglas and Meredith W. Michaels, The Mommy Myth: The Idealization of Motherhood and How It Has Undermined All Women (New York: Free Press, 2004)。
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