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可以认为,原译者的旧信息的存储不足,作者行文至此,已经为读者提供了足量的旧信息,关于Gregor对Veronica所抱的态度,有以下遣词,如:dictatorial streak, cold assertiveness in his touch,等等。更有甚者,当莱斯和维罗妮卡断绝关系之际,维罗妮卡有一个判断:he did not love her enough to rescue her from Gregor,此言虽然是在讲莱斯,其中一个动词rescue,和盘托出了她和丈夫之间的关系。因此,句中的refused to name的宾语,不可能是无关紧要的所谓“告诉她是些什么聚会”,而应该是complaints(疾病),同时,也与上句的about which Gregor was adamantly mysterious也是文脉相传。
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另外,原句中的adamantly mysterious也值得细品,也具有移就的修辞色彩,整个副词adamantly跟上文的形容词cold, assertiveness等也存在着文意巧妙呼应之关系。
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【改译】他与维罗妮卡之间的隐情,就像未被治疗的传染病在煎熬着他。年复一年,维罗妮卡似乎也因此备受煎熬;她好像从来没有完全从蜂螫中恢复过来。有时她体重下降,形容枯槁;间或她又虚胖超重。有时,她会去医院,对此,格雷戈尔讳莫如深;有些日子,维罗妮卡深居在家,饱受疾患之苦,至于是何种疾患,独自一人出现在派对上的格雷戈尔则绝口不提。莱斯消极而不失浪漫地想象着维罗妮卡可能是一时心志不坚,向格雷戈尔坦白了他们的私情,因而被丈夫软禁;要不然就是失去莱斯的悔恨在噬咬着她娇弱的躯体。她的美丽并没有因为虚弱而消损,反而增添了一种别样的风韵,凄艳而动人。多年的日光浴(那时所有的女人都晒日光浴)之后,维罗妮卡对日光很敏感,整个夏季她脸色一直苍白。三十开外后,牙齿也出了毛病。她定期去正牙和牙周病专家那里诊治,牙科诊所位于在附近一座中型城市的一幢高楼内。莱斯,就在对面的大楼里上班,任职投资顾问。
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Once, he glimpsed her from his window as she reported, preoccupied and solemn in a dark, wide-skirted cloth coat, for treatment across the street. After that, he kept looking out his window for her, mourning the decade they had let slip by while married to other people. Lisa’s outdoor bounce and freckled good nature had become somewhat butch; her hair, like her mother’s, turned gray early. Gregor was rumored to be discontented and having affairs. Les imagined these betrayals as wounds Veronica was enduring, within the silent prison of her marriage. He still saw her at parties, but across the room, and, when he did maneuver close to her, she had little to say. During their affair they had shared, along with sex, concerns about their children, and memories of their parents and upbringings. This sort of innocent exposure of another, eagerly apprehended life figures among the things lovers lose, a flow of blameless confidences that, halted, builds up a pressure.
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【原译】一次,他从窗口瞥见维罗妮卡,她正在街对面的诊所看牙齿,她身着下摆宽大的外套,在黑暗中神态肃穆专注,正向医生说着什么。自从那次以后,他时常探出头搜寻她的身影,想着多年来两人分别有个自己的妻子和丈夫而无缘在一起时,不禁感伤起来。活跃的户外活动以及好动的天性使丽莎趋向男性化;她的发色,就像她母亲的那样,过早的褪成了灰色。传闻中格雷戈尔则对婚姻不满,现在也有了外遇。莱斯设想着与格雷戈尔的婚姻是禁锢维罗妮卡的牢笼,男方的背叛在维罗妮卡心中留下了一道道伤口,她只能默默忍受着伤口带来的伤痛。他仍然看到她出没于各种聚会,但在房间的另一头,当他设计接近她的时候,她话语却少得可怜。记得在他们以往的交往过程中,他们除了一起做爱,还一起分享生活中遇到的点点滴滴,比如谈谈他们各自的孩子,对自己父母以及孩童时代的回忆。恋人间无可厚非的信任,一种双方毫无保留的坦诚,急切希望告知对方在遇到彼此前的点滴往事。这种相互坦诚、相互理解一旦不再继续就会给双方形成压力。
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当然,不得不承认,阅读,尤其是阅读非母语作品,存在许多非理论、非悟性、非语感所能解决的难点。比如上句的freckled good nature,究竟为何意?澳大利亚作家Denise的释义是:
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“Freckled good nature” refers to a “girl next door” quality—friendly, happy, easy going. Freckles are seen to be young, innocent, cute, playful and tom-boyish—not at all sophisticated. This is not an expression as such, but an inventive combination of words (I’ve heard such combinations referred to as “colliding words”)—words the writer has thrown together to create a colorful image in the reader’s mind.
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难哉!下句:This sort of innocent exposure of another, eagerly apprehended life figures among the things lovers lose, a flow of blameless confidences that, halted, builds up a pressure.美国教授Bill Hofmann视此句中的life figures为名词词组:
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I’m a little less certain here—this author is a bit convoluted in style. The “life figures” seems to refer to the people mentioned in the previous sentence: children, parents and others suggested in the “upbringings”. These shared discussions about family and their youth are associations lost when the affair is terminated.
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而澳大利亚作家Denise却认为其中的figures为全句之谓语动词。Denise的解答如下:
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The phrase here is not “life figures” but “eagerly apprended life”(“figures” is the verb). I feel this phrase refers to the fact that the lives of lovers can be confided without fear of judgment or blame - lovers meet in an atmosphere of sharing and enthusiasm for each other’s stories. (Here the writer talks of lovers sharing concerns about children and memories of their parents and upbringings.) I feel “apprehend” here means “recognize and understand”.
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同样,对付如此难句,利用格式塔心理学的理论进行思考和理解,会给译者带来有益的启示。
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阅读过程中的理想阐释和正确理解的前提是:译者与原作者创作时处于相同,或大致相同的心态。事实上,由于表现符号本身具有模糊性和多元性,作品本身留有许多空白,以及译者与作者具有不同的先结构,译者阐释最终形成的是译者自己的格式塔结构。此结构应与原作者创作心理相似,或者说与作者创作心理结构同构异体(homologue)。高明的译者能够在注重整体意象再造这一点上,寻找到两者最佳的契合点。
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赫伯特·托尔曼在《翻译的艺术》中与格式塔理论不谋而合地指出,译者在理解原文时,必须使自己完全沉浸在原作的思想和情感中,读到原文的词句,应在脑子里产生出其所指物,即形成概念,然后再从译语中找出对应的词,表达这一概念。托尔曼主张通过概念这一桥梁使原文向译文过渡。不过应该指出的是,概念不能是片面的、零碎的,而应该是整体的。只有当主体对客体形成了整体概念,才能保证各个单独概念的有机统一,才能转换原文话语所表达的各种功能意义,甚至社会意义。
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This sort of innocent exposure of another, eagerly apprehended life figures among the things lovers lose, a flow of blameless confidences that, halted, builds up a pressure.从局部的,零碎的事实,我们可以得出的整体概念是:曾经的情爱让莱斯和维罗妮卡无所不为,无所不谈。子女、父母及自己的成长,曾经是在性爱之余带来无限快慰的话题。但是,此刻情爱关系已经终止,性爱连同两人的絮絮情话都随之终止。这一点自然而然在彼此的心头渐成压力。
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所谓整体概念,即译者和原作者处于相同的心态(当然需要生活经验的积淀),构成了理解上句的可靠基础。原译者的整体概念基本正确,从其译文可以看出:“恋人间无可厚非的信任,一种双方毫无保留的坦诚,急切希望告知对方在遇到彼此前的点滴往事。这种相互坦诚相互理解一旦不再继续就会给双方形成压力。”
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然而,原译却经不起推敲。关键问题在于,对原句中的动词figure的含义尚未吃透。American Heritage Dictionary对figure(用作不及物动词)的释义之一是:to be or seem important or prominent(露头角,显得重要)。另一个引起误解的名词是confidences。confidence在此语境中,并无“信任”的意思,而是“知心话,私房话”的意思。格式塔心理学理论的统摄观,再加上对句中难词特殊意义的洞悉,难句便不再难。
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由此可见,语言功底与所谓整体概念的结合同等重要,缺一不可。从这个意义上讲,翻译理论家,即使其理论研究方向对头,假如缺乏了扎实丰富的SL和TL的蕴蓄,也不可能成为译林高手。
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此又一例:mourning the decade they had let slip by while married to other people。原译为:想着多年来两人分别有个自己的妻子和丈夫而无缘在一起时,不禁感伤起来。原句表达清朗,层次感、节奏感俱佳。相应译文竟然恁地诘屈聱牙!
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【改译】一次,莱斯从窗口瞥见了维罗妮卡去街对面诊所看病,她身着一件黑色的宽下摆棉质外套,神情专注而又严肃。打那以后,莱斯总是透过窗户意欲寻觅维罗妮卡的身影,哀叹十年光阴瞬息过,却与旁人共枕席。莉莎热衷户外活动,性情快活随和,让她多少像个男人。她的头发像她母亲一样,过早变灰白了。有传言说,格雷戈尔对她不满,且有了外遇。莱斯想象着,在无声的婚姻监狱中,维罗妮卡在无声忍受丈夫的不忠造成的心灵创痛。莱斯仍可以在派对上见到维罗妮卡,但只是远观而已,当他想方设法靠近维罗妮卡时,维罗妮卡总是缄默无言。当年卿卿我我时,他们做爱,还倾吐对子女的关爱,回忆各自的父母及各自的成长经历。在情人们所失却的东西当中,首当其冲的是对各自生活的真诚的袒露和热切的倾听,这种絮絮的倾诉无可厚非,而一旦中止,便会积聚成一种压力。
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So when he spotted Veronica leaving the dentists’ building, unmistakably her although he was ten stories high and she was bundled against the winter winds, he left his office without bothering with a topcoat and ambushed her on the sidewalk a half block away.
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【原译】所以当他看到维罗妮卡离开牙医的办公楼,千真万确断定就是她的时候,虽然他在十层楼,而她迎着冬天的寒风匆忙走着,他却懒得披一件外套离开办公室,在半个街区的人行道上埋伏好了等着她。
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格式塔心理学,用于测试,就产生了Cloze Test(完形填空);格式塔心理理论若用于翻译上,也可以而且应该让译者对原文中的个别朦胧表达完成Cloze Test式的成功闭合。
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以he left his office without bothering with a topcoat一句为例,其中的bothering就是一个cloze test式的词汇。遗憾的是,原译者的闭合没有成功,其译文是:他却懒得披一件外套离开办公室。此译的“懒得”二字,宛如在一只打足气的皮球上突然戳了一个洞,皮球顿时泄气,再也无法弹跳。用林语堂先生的比方,叫“字卧纸上”。
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【改译】因此,当莱斯发现维罗妮卡离开牙医所在的大楼的时候,尽管他身处十层高楼上,尽管维罗妮卡顶着冬日寒风,裹得严严实实,他能肯定那就是维罗妮卡。连大衣也没顾上穿,莱斯就离开了办公室,在半个街区外的人行道上悄悄守候维罗妮卡。
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